Wednesday, 4 February 2015

The Fear of Fraud: An Honest Reflection

I'm doing something a bit different here: I'm reflecting and confronting. I'm very vulnerable here, and am literally confronting some 'demons' that I've struggled with for a long time, inspired by those who have done so before me.

***

Beauty and the Beast is perhaps my favourite fairy tale. When I saw the contest hosted by Anne Elisabeth Stengl, my mind started racing with ideas.

However, I've struggled with a lot of things in the past few years--whispers that I'm not good enough, not original enough. That what I have is, in the end, not genuine. That I'm merely a copycat, that what I want to give to the world has already been done. That my voice, whatever it may be, shouldn't be shared because it has nothing new to give. I worried so much about being too much like others that, in the end, I couldn't find myself as a writer.

And in the end, I pounded out a story just because I couldn't let those whispers win--because if I didn't write something, I would indeed feel like a fraud. All the ideas I'd dreamed of earlier withered because I felt they were not original enough, and by the time I'd found the confidence to commit to one despite those whispers, I almost didn't finish it.

Obviously, the story I did end up writing did not win the contest. But I received a different kind of victory. A victory over the devil's lies, a victory over a plague of anxiety that has haunted me for months. And while the anxiety still lingers (and perhaps always will), I know myself again.

I am a writer.

And I will never stop writing--despite disappointment, despite desperation, despite the devil. To spite the devil.

Monday, 26 January 2015

Antics and Adventures in Albion: Vlog, Part One

Hi everyone!

I am currently living in England for a four-month semester abroad program. To record some of our adventures, my friend Kristen and I decided to vlog together. So here's part one of our Antics and Adventures in Albion! :D




Friday, 16 January 2015

Cover Reveal! Draven's Light, by Anne Elisabeth Stengl

I am very pleased to help host the cover reveal for Anne Elisabeth Stengl's newest novella, Draven's Light. The cover is absolutely lovely--very atmospheric, and the colours...

Well, here it is for yourselves!



In the Darkness of the Pit
The Light Shines Brightest

Drums summon the chieftain’s powerful son to slay a man in cold blood and thereby earn his place among the warriors. But instead of glory, he earns the name Draven, “Coward.” When the men of his tribe march off to war, Draven remains behind with the women and his shame. Only fearless but crippled Ita values her brother’s honor.

The warriors return from battle victorious yet trailing a curse in their wake. One by one the strong and the weak of the tribe fall prey to an illness of supernatural power. The secret source of this evil can be found and destroyed by only the bravest heart.

But when the curse attacks the one Draven loves most, can this coward find the courage he needs to face the darkness?

Coming May 25, 2015

WIN IT!

You can win one of three ARCs of the novella, either by filling out the Rafflecopter form below, or entering over at Anne Elisabeth Stengl's blog.



AUTHOR BIO:



ANNE ELISABETH STENGL makes her home in North Carolina, where she lives with her husband, Rohan, a kindle of kitties, and one long-suffering dog. When she’s not writing, she enjoys Shakespeare, opera, and tea, and practices piano, painting, and pastry baking. She is the author of the critically-acclaimed Tales of Goldstone Wood. Her novel Starflower was awarded the 2013 Clive Staples Award, and her novels Heartless, Veiled Rose, and Dragonwitch have each been honored with a Christy Award.
To learn more about Anne Elisabeth Stengl and her books visit: www.AnneElisabethStengl.blogspot.com



PRE-ORDER IT!




EXCERPT:

Excerpt from
DRAVEN’S LIGHT
By Anne Elisabeth Stengl
(coming May 25, 2015)


He heard the drums in his dreams, distant but drawing ever nearer. He had heard them before and wondered if the time of his manhood had come. But with the approach of dawn, the drums always faded away and he woke to the world still a child. Still a boy.
But this night, the distant drums were louder, stronger. Somehow he knew they were not concocted of his sleeping fancy. No, even as he slept he knew these were real drums, and he recognized the beat: The beat of death. The beat of blood.
The beat of a man’s heart.
He woke with a start, his leg throbbing where it had just been kicked. It was not the sort of awakening he had longed for these last two years and more. He glared from his bed up into the face of his sister, who stood above him, balancing her weight on a stout forked branch tucked under her left shoulder.
“Ita,” the boy growled, “what are you doing here? Go back to the women’s hut!”
His sister made a face at him, but he saw, even by the moonlight streaming through cracks in the thatch above, that her eyes were very round and solemn. Only then did he notice that the drumbeats of his dream were indeed still booming deep in the woods beyond the village fires. He sat up then, his heart thudding its own thunderous pace.
“A prisoner,” Ita said, shifting her branch so that she might turn toward the door. “The drums speak of a prisoner. They’re bringing him even now.” She flashed a smile down at him, though it was so tense with anxiety it could hardly be counted a smile at all. “Gaho, your name!”
The boy was up and out of his bed in a moment, reaching for a tunic and belt. His sister hobbled back along the wall but did not leave, though he wished she would. He wished she would allow him these few moments before the drums arrived in the village. The drums that beat of one man’s death . . . and one man’s birth.
His name was Gaho. But by the coming of dawn, if the drums’ promise was true, he would be born again in blood and bear a new name.
Hands shaking with what he desperately hoped wasn’t fear, he tightened his belt and searched the room for his sickle blade. He saw the bone handle, white in the moonlight, protruding from beneath his bed pile, and swiftly took it up. The bronze gleamed dully, like the carnivorous tooth of an ancient beast.
A shudder ran through his sister’s body. Gaho, sensing her distress, turned to her. She grasped her supporting branch hard, and the smile was gone from her face. “Gaho,” she said, “will you do it?”
“I will,” said Gaho, his voice strong with mounting excitement.
But Ita reached out to him suddenly, catching his weapon hand just above the wrist. “I will lose you,” she said. “My brother . . . I will lose you!”
“You will not. You will lose only Gaho,” said the boy, shaking her off, gently, for she was not strong. Without another word, he ducked through the door of his small hut—one he had built for himself but a year before in anticipation of his coming manhood—and stood in the darkness of Rannul Village, eyes instinctively turning to the few campfires burning. The drums were very near now, and he could see the shadows of waking villagers moving about the fires, building up the flames in preparation for what must surely follow. He felt eyes he could not see turning to his hut, turning to him. He felt the question each pair of eyes asked in silent curiosity: Will it be tonight?
Tonight or no night.
Grasping the hilt of his weapon with both hands, Gaho strode to the dusty village center, which was beaten down into hard, packed earth from years of meetings and matches of strength held in this same spot. Tall pillars of aged wood ringed this circle, and women hastened to these, bearing torches which they fit into hollowed-out slots in each pillar. Soon the village center was bright as noonday, but with harsh red light appropriate for coming events.
Gaho stood in the center of that light, his heart ramming in his throat though his face was a stoic mask. All the waking village was gathered now, men, women, and children, standing just beyond the circle, watching him.
The drums came up from the river, pounding in time to the tramp of warriors’ feet. Then the warriors themselves were illuminated by the ringing torches, their faces anointed in blood, their heads helmed with bone and bronze, their shoulders covered in hides of bear, wolf, and boar. Ten men carried tight skin drums, beating them with their fists. They entered the center first, standing each beneath one of the ringing pillars. Other warriors followed them, filling in the gaps between.
Then the chieftain, mighty Gaher, appeared. He carried his heavy crescent ax in one hand, and Gaho saw that blood stained its edge—indeed, blood spattered the blade from tip to hilt and covered the whole of the chieftain’s fist. Gaher strode into the circle, and the boy saw more blood in his beard. But he also saw the bright, wolfish smile and knew for certain that his sister had been correct. The night of naming had come.
“My son,” said the chief, saluting Gaho with upraised weapon.
“My father,” said Gaho, raising his sickle blade in return.
 “Are you ready this night to die and live again?” asked the chief. His voice carried through the shadows, and every one of the tribe heard it, and any and all listening beasts of forests and fields surrounding. “Are you ready this night for the spilling of blood that must flow before life may begin?”
Gaho drew a deep breath, putting all the strength of his spirit into his answer. “I am ready, Father.”
Gaher’s smile grew, the torchlight flashing red upon his sharpened canines. He turned then and motioned to the darkness beyond the torchlight.
The sacrifice was brought forward.

I hope you all enjoyed this cover reveal--and enjoy the novella even more! It looks like it's going to be an eerie, heart-wrenching story!  

Monday, 10 November 2014

Golden Daughter out today!

Pretty self-explanatory, folks. :)

BEYOND THE REALM OF DREAMS IS A WORLD SHE NEVER IMAGINED
Masayi Sairu was raised to be dainty, delicate, demure . . . and deadly. She is one of the emperor’s Golden Daughters, as much a legend as she is a commodity. One day, Sairu will be contracted in marriage to a patron, whom she will secretly guard for the rest of her life.

But when she learns that a sacred Dream Walker of the temple seeks the protection of a Golden Daughter, Sairu forgoes marriage in favor of this role. Her skills are stretched to the limit, for assassins hunt in the shadows, and phantoms haunt in dreams. With only a mysterious Faerie cat and a handsome slave—possessed of his own strange abilities—to help her, can Sairu shield her new mistress from evils she can neither see nor touch?

For the Dragon is building an army of fire. And soon the heavens will burn.


-image and description from Goodreads.com

You can purchase this book in:

Print

Kindle

Nook


Go and get it! You won't regret it! :D




Book Review: "Golden Daughter," by Anne Elisabeth Stengl


BEYOND THE REALM OF DREAMS IS A WORLD SHE NEVER IMAGINED

Masayi Sairu was raised to be dainty, delicate, demure . . . and deadly. She is one of the emperor’s Golden Daughters, as much a legend as she is a commodity. One day, Sairu will be contracted in marriage to a patron, whom she will secretly guard for the rest of her life.

But when she learns that a sacred Dream Walker of the temple seeks the protection of a Golden Daughter, Sairu forgoes marriage in favor of this role. Her skills are stretched to the limit, for assassins hunt in the shadows, and phantoms haunt in dreams. With only a mysterious Faerie cat and a handsome slave—possessed of his own strange abilities—to help her, can Sairu shield her new mistress from evils she can neither see nor touch?

For the Dragon is building an army of fire. And soon the heavens will burn.
--image and description from Goodreads.com

I feel like I say this every time I review an Anne Elisabeth Stengl novel (though, to be fair, she says this almost word for word about what her favourite of her books is): Golden Daughter, the newest scroll in The Tales of Goldstone Wood series, is my absolute favourite of all her books.

Part of it is the fact that the setting is influenced by ancient Asian cultures. While I was reading, I was simply struck by the respect and love Stengl showed for both the achievements and histories of those peoples. I loved that Masayi Sairu, the heroine, was a warrior. I loved that she was smart, actually saved the day on numerous occasions, and, most of all, I loved how she--and the book--kept revealing new facets of their natures.

This book has a lovely, dreamy-dark atmosphere. Terrible things happen, but these terrible things are lightened by adorable fluffy dogs and a certain loud-mouthed cat.

The romance in this book was heartbreaking yet beautiful--subtle and true. Love, like in all of Stengl's novels, is explored in various depictions...each with a heartache of its own.

And it was amazing. This is the book that I will be toting with me to Oxford (if I can fit its near-600 page bulk into my suitcase).

Tuesday, 29 July 2014

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ROSE: The Story That Surprised Me


I read a lot of books, and I try to write a lot of them. I've heard of authors who, while working on one project, are completely smote by another. And, though I've experienced that in a minute degree, never have I so completely as now.

Once upon a time--not very long ago, actually--I was struggling to come up with ideas for my other story, A ROSE FOR A DREAM. Nothing was clicking, and my brain was snagged by another concept. I wanted a more mysterious story than the ones I was currently working on--one that matched my love of CRUEL BEAUTY by Rosamund Hodge and THE QUEEN'S THIEF series by Megan Whalen Turner.


What do you get when you marry those two stories, and add a sprinkling of PERSUASION by Jane Austen?


THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ROSE, the story that dropped into my lap.


Now, elements of this story stem from an idea for the Five Enchanted Roses contest I'd been kicking around with Hannah, but an idea I'd rejected initially. But as I started thinking about it more and more, the story suddenly struck me all at once. I'd been handling my main character all wrong--and, once I started seeing her differently, the elements I loved from Hodge's main character Nyx found new and different life in my main character Leta.


I can't say much more than that for fear of spoiling everything. So here's more about the actual story itself, as little as I can offer you:


Leta Ashworth's life has finally returned to some hint of normalcy now that her father has been released from prison. She and her family, though reduced to poverty, make the most they can out of their new, meager roles as fisher-folk.

But one day a familiar face rides through her village, and Leta finds herself facing a man with the potential to be her beloved--or a beast. Either way, his life may be in danger, and only Leta can save him.


 A retelling of Beauty and the Beast and Jane Austen's Persuasion, where neither the Beast--nor the Beauty--are truly what they 

seem...


To get a taste of the characters and setting, you may visit the story's

EXCERPT
(from the beginning of the story)

Then, from the corner of her eye, she noticed a lone horseman riding through the village. Travellers were not uncommon, but this particular traveller was no stranger to Leta's gaze. She was the only one compelled to leave her station and watch the man as he rode along the dirt road, his cloak whipped about by the wind.

“Leta! Get yer hind over here!”

She turned back to her fish, but not before casting one last look over her shoulder. A knot of emotions twisted in her stomach, and the familiar sting of fish in her nostrils suddenly did not seem so comforting. Bile rose in her throat. To the astonishment of her fellow women, Leta, with a stomach better than any man in the village, sank to her knees and retched.

Friday, 11 July 2014

By Request: Until Midnight

By the request of a young woman named Raechel on Pinterest, I have decided to share my short story, Until Midnight, with you all here on the blog. I wrote it last year for the Five Glass Slippers Contest hosted by Rooglewood Press. It retells Cinderella from the point of view of the eldest stepsister--who may be more of a fairy godmother than anything else...

While it is a novella, I have no intention of ever publishing it now; at the time, I enjoyed writing it, but it is definitely not my best work. However, I hope you will all gain some enjoyment from it! :) 

I will be posting it chapter-by-chapter, sometimes with two chapters to a post depending on how long they are.

So, without further ado, the first two chapters of Until Midnight.


Until Midnight
by Rebeka Borshevsky


(i)
Where It All Begins
When Maman told us we would be purchasing another servant, I did not expect my late stepfather’s daughter to be the unfortunate victim. Upon returning to the mansion after my usual afternoon carriage ride through Le Parc de Roses, I found my stepsister scrubbing the floor of the main hall. Light poured through the high, narrow windows, illuminating Elle’s golden curls.
I stopped, staring. “What are you doing that for? It’s the servant girl’s job.”
Elle looked at me with her mournful blue eyes, and my jaw dropped in that unladylike manner Maman detested. “Why?” I whispered.
She swallowed. “Papa left everything to your mother,” she said, her voice choked. “I have not a penny to my name.”
I blinked. Monsieur Renard must have been very ill—and Maman at her most manipulative. Stooping beside her, I said, “I’ll give you money.”
Her shoulders sagged. “Do you have any money to give?”
I gnawed my lower lip. “No,” I conceded. Maman was the one who doled out allowances.
She nodded. “There you go.” She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and sucked in a deep breath. “I will make the best of it.”
I left her there crying into the soapsuds and stormed into Monsieur Renard’s study. Maman sat at his old desk, twiddling a quill between her fingers as she studied accounts. “Eloise Gertrude D’Arcale, what did I tell you about stomping your feet?”
“What did you do to him?” I snarled, ignoring her reprimand.
She arched a perfectly shaped brow. “Do to whom?”
“Monsieur Renard! There’s no possible way he would have left everything to you and nothing to his only daughter!”
Her eyes flashed. “Why not?” she asked. “I am his wife and the mother of his children.”
“You don’t act like one to her,” I said. And we weren’t his children—just his stepchildren.
She sighed, tapping the end of her quill against the desk. “This is about that coachman again, isn’t it?”
I stiffened, a flush creeping over my neck. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
She snorted—a delicate snort, as was becoming of one of her station. “He approached me to ask for your hand in marriage,” she said.
Idiot. I bit back a scowl, hiding clenched fists behind my skirts.
“I refused,” she continued, watching me from the corner of her eye.
I’d expected as much. If mon père was still alive, he would have welcomed the match. Michael was an honest man, a hard worker, and most of all, he respected me. Papa would have preferred I marry a good poor man than a rich cruel one who would only parade me around to feed his own vanity.
Maman’s sights soared far higher than Papa’s modest wishes for my future.
I shrugged. Michael had refused on the grounds of honour to elope with me. So here we were, waiting. But I would not allow Maman to see how much her words affected me and let her win yet another battle.
“I’m sure he will be sorely disappointed,” I said.
Her lips twitched with a frown when I did not give her the outburst she’d wanted. I almost smiled.
(ii)
A Noblewoman and Her Coachman
The next afternoon, following lessons with my tutor, I ventured into the city. Unlike most noblewomen, I sat atop the box with the driver for the company. I gripped the seat as the carriage jolted over the cobbles, swerving around sharp corners and sending my hat flying into the air. I snatched it back, pulling it over my trundled curls.
We passed girls selling flowers on corners, clothed in bright-coloured rags. Shops lined the street—dressmakers and candlestick makers and the bakery. The rich aroma of fresh baked bread made my mouth water. I leaned out, inhaling deeply and closing my eyes to savour the flavour. Warmth fell across my eyelashes, the sun smiling down on us from his court in the bright blue sky.
Beside me, Michael sat as straight and stiff as a horse whip. I ignored him, focusing on the greenery of Le Parc de Roses as it appeared to my right. Birds chattered from the trees, squirrels dashing across the vibrant lawns. It was the nicest spot in the city of Avive, full of benches on which to perch and peruse a book. Many an afternoon I had done just that, lost in another world as la Seine gurgled past my feet on its path to the palace.
We turned through the gates onto a side avenue of Le Parc, the trees casting cool shadows over our heads. It was quiet and private here, so I dared remove my hat and use it to fan my face.
Michael slumped back, scuffing his toe along the rim of the box. “She said no.”
“I told you not to ask her.” I pulled a book out of my satchel and flipped through it.
“What was I supposed to do? Elope with you and be dragged to jail for abducting a noblewoman?”
I scowled. “It’s hardly abducting. I would go quite willingly. I am twenty-one years old, for pity’s sake. I’m surprised Maman hasn’t despaired of marrying me off and forced me into servitude.” My tone was sharper than I’d intended.
Michael’s expression softened. “I’m sorry to hear about Elle,” he said. “The poor girl.”
“Penniless,” I spat. “And Maman lavishes money on dresses and makeup for Ilyse and I while refusing me the only thing I want.”
Michael shifted. I knew he wanted to wrap his arm around me to offer comfort, but it was improper when we were alone and had not even the hope of a future betrothal. I looked into his tanned, laugh-lined face. His dark brown hair was streaked with sunlight. His brown eyes regarded me with the same intelligent thoughtfulness as always, but this time there was an element of sorrow.
“I fear I may have to request being moved to a new family,” he said quietly.
My throat choked up. The mere finger-length of distance between us suddenly felt far wider. “Why?”
“Because if I continue in your employ, I fear I may do something we’ll both regret later.” He sighed. “I want to marry you, but to have you dangled in front of my face and told I can’t—” He looked at me, his face grave. “It’s torture for a man in love.”
I nodded. “I understand,” I said. “I—” I broke off. I would not tell him how much I’d miss our daily rambles in Le Parc de Roses, chatting about politics and literature and music while laughing at the nobility’s ridiculous sense of fashion these days. To ponder what we’d lose would only make everything more difficult.
“How….how long do you think it will take you to find a new situation?” I croaked.
“It depends. It could be anywhere between a day and a month. But I will start looking now.”
I turned to stare at the trees, which all blurred together as we went by. Something fell into my lap.
A copy of Love and War by Petrov Skimov, a prevalent writer from the empire of Rus to the east. When his novel had first been translated, it had been all the rage.
I’d read it in its original form, before it became a hit in Avive and the rest of Freanc.
It was the book that brought Michael and I together. When I had passed the stable and spied a lowly coach boy reading the novel in its difficult Rusian language, my interest had been piqued. We’d maintained a close friendship ever since, but it wasn’t until mon père had died and Maman married Monsieur Renard that I realized how much Michael meant to me. He had come with us to Monsieur Renard’s mansion, and I’d naively believed we would somehow be together forever.
Now I gripped the novel in my hands and clutched it to my heart.
“‘Love without war in the soul is not love at all’,” Michael quoted.
I sniffled. “‘And love that bests that war is the best one of all’,” I quoted back.

“This is not the end yet,” he said, taking the reins in hand. “Unless we let it be.” And with a cluck to the horse, we sprang forward into a gallop. My hat flew off and my curls tumbled from their careful pins on top of my head. This time I let them all fall and leaned forward to kiss the wind.

Til Next Time...